Won't there be too many demands placed on my child during ABA therapy? Should I be worried?
It is very true that an ABA program places many demands on your child. And it is also true parents have to put the same demands on their kids too for the therapy to be effective.
For example : If all your child's teachers and therapists make him ask for his own food, but you don't like to see him struggle to find the right words and instead jump in and offer food before he asks for it, then he may not generalize that communication skill as quickly as he otherwise would.
This is a simple example; there are other things you may need to ask of your child that s/he will find much harder and because s/he is not used to you as a parent placing a demand on them. They may react more strongly by crying, yelling, hitting, running away. Understandably, it is hard as a parent not to give in and just do whatever seems necessary "at the moment" to make things easier for your child.
In the long run, however, it is probably easier for both of you to maintain the demands and make learning happen, than to adapt yourself to his/her (unconscious) desire not to change.
This is not peculiar to children with autism; all parents learn that life goes better if they insist that their children clean up their toys, observe table manners, stay close in stores, even if it takes some amount of stress to enforce those rules. Does this affect your loving, trusting relationship?
The trust and love that you and your child feel for each other is built on thousands and thousands of positive, successful, joyful interactions. Being firm when it is appropriate is the quickest path away from unwanted behaviors and situations, the best route to positive, happy experiences. You will have to place more demands on your child as he/she grows older so that they don't develop extreme behaviors. It is best if you can help your child to be successful, independent.